A few weeks back, I was looking at my blog stats, and somebody had googled “does country life get easier” and found their way to my blog. My heart immediately sank. Not because I didn’t want to answer the question, but because I knew what this person was probably feeling. Because I have been there too.
It’s been almost four years since we moved back to the farm. The first few months of our move were full of excitement and new things, but after that began to subside, I found myself living in a place that was very different from anything I knew, feeling homesick for our old life, with few supports, and in the middle of a steep learning curve. It was hard. If it were really an option, I would have happily packed up my home and moved back to the mountains to resume my old life.
So does country life get easier? Thankfully, the answer is yes! But this comes with an explanation.
Country life doesn’t become easier because it changes…
but because you change and adapt to your new life.
The loneliness will get better as you meet more people, and develop friendships
Making friends takes time and effort. For us it took about 12 months before we really made any friends, and another few months after that before we felt settled with those friends. Everything is easier when you have a friend!
You will develop the skills you need through practice
Learning to handle stock, and deal with produce from the garden takes time and practice, but it does become easier. Earlier this year I managed to put the sheep in the shed all by myself. Something I could never have done four years ago. I have more confidence because I’ve done it lots of time with CB. It was nerve wracking but I did it!!Having a go at new things, and being prepared to make mistakes will help you develop the skills you need.
You will get better at planning
The distance you need to travel for business or work stays the same, but you will become better at anticipating what you need. I have become better at organising myself so that when I’m in town I do all the shopping at once. I also do a lot of our shopping on line. We have adapted to longer drives to town, and now I quite enjoy the time as it gives us a chance to chat uninterrupted by the other demands of life on the farm.
You will get used to the idea that a farm is a seven day a week job
We live where we work, so we only truly get a break when we go away for a weekend or holiday. CB works from sun up to sun down all year round, and in summer this is often very late. However, working for himself also gives him the flexibility to go to the kids school for their assemblies and sports days, and to be a parent helper when needed. Something that my job definitely doesn’t allow for. During school holidays, we can easily go for a family day out, as he doesn’t have an employer to keep happy.
Country living is hard. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. There is so much more I could say about this. But I want to encourage who ever found my blog by asking that question (and anyone else in the same situation), to keep on going. New things are always hard. You will find your groove. You will adapt to your new life, and it will get easier!
Have you ever made a big change and then wondered if it would ever get easier?
p.s. If you’re that person, or if you find yourself in the same situation, shoot me an email via my contact page. I’d be only too happy to chat a bit more specifically or to provide some support.
I love hearing the real deal because often I fall for the pretty pics on instagram and I know my vision of country life is probably very different to the reality. Yes it is pretty and ideallic .. but much more hard work than an insta snap shows xx
I think it is great that you have heard that one voice in the crowd reaching out and have written a post for them, because there will be others feeling the same way who haven’t been able to reach out.
Thanks Malinda. Google searches often give me ideas about what to write about, though sometimes people google some pretty weird stuff.
Oh yeah. Country life is hard. I remember city life days when I had NOTHING to do in the weekend… just sitting around reading the paper and napping! But it was also boring. In the country I am never bored, I am always busy, and it makes me happy. It takes some getting used to though 🙂 I like the way you explained it.
I occasionally wish for a quiet morning reading the paper, though the 50 minute round trip to go get it is not appealing!
This is really interesting, Jo. I have often craved a country lifestyle (as you know!), but I know I’m not hard working enough for us to ever make it work. I think being a farmer is definitely a case of work-life-integration rather than balance!! You are a good soul to call out to the person doing the searching. x
Thanks Bron x