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Letting My Kids Be Kids

Hannah has been introduced to ‘Gangnam style’ at school. So thrilled about that – not. She came home and promptly taught Meg the words “Ooooh – sexy lady” (probably because they are the only ones she can remember). Meg then started repeatedly singing it around the house. Once it got into her head, she just kept singing it, despite my telling her to stop. Many, many times.

How do you explain to a 5 year old what “Oooh, sexy lady” means, much less why it is not appropriate  for her to say? I know Meg doesn’t understand what it means, but in some ways that makes it worse. After several days of me reminding her that it is not something that is appropriate for little girls to say, she has stopped (thank goodness).

I have always been protective of my kids. Not in a never allowed out of my sight way (They have so much freedom around the farm) but in a ‘cutting out too many outside influences, and allowing my children to remain children for as long as possible” way. We are careful about the types of DVDs, and television we allow our kids to watch, and the music they listen to. I will not buy clothing for my kids which is too short/ tight/ adult looking. In short we want our kids to be kids.

Songs that are full of adult ideas like ‘being sexy’ are just another way in which the adult world is encroaching on my kids childhood. I want to wait until they have the emotional maturity to deal with adult concepts before I introduce them. Asking kids to deal with these things too early is not good for them.

Even when my kids are old enough to understand what ‘sexy’ means, I want them to value themselves for qualities like their kindness, perseverance  courage, and strong work ethic. I never want them to value themselves (or be valued for others) for how sexy they are. A song which seems to go on and on about being “sexy” whilst men leer at women’s bottoms is not the kind of image or lyrics I want my kids to see.

I know that gangnam style is not the worst offender, but it is the one which has been going through our house at the moment.

What do you think? Am I over reacting? Do you mind your kids singing these kinds of songs? Should I just home school my kids, lock the farm gate, and never allow them to meet anyone until they are 25? 

Linking up with Jess for IBOT

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Comments

  1. Annaleis Topham says

    November 20, 2012 at 12:32 pm

    You need to do what is good for your family. Although growing up in the 70's with slightly hippy parents I can say that the songs we sang and listened to had the same connotations they just used the words of their era. As kids you don't understand what that means. They are just songs that Mum and Dad listen to and you sing along to.

    Reply
  2. EssentiallyJess says

    November 20, 2012 at 10:39 am

    I don't like it either, but we have substituted the words. For some reason 4 yo Bailey thought it was 'hey ships and ladders' so that is what we sing now 🙂

    Reply
  3. annewheaton says

    November 20, 2012 at 10:10 am

    Looking back at some of the songs I loved and sang when I was a young girl, I’m quite appalled at the lyrics and amazed my mother didn’t say anything. Though of course if she had then I may have sung even louder. Even now my (grown-up) children ask me if I understand what songs allude to while I sing along and of course I don’t.
    You aren't over-reacting; children grow up too quickly these days and are exposed to so many things that parents may not like. But don't forget that family values go a long way to counteracting this.

    Reply
  4. lyndaal says

    November 19, 2012 at 11:24 pm

    I dont think you are over reacting, not at all. Its hard – adn there are some songs that are played in the radio that make me stop and going ummmm what the, because it is not approriate, and im a good 20 something years older than your daughter!!

    #teamIBOT

    Reply
  5. Beth Winsor says

    November 19, 2012 at 10:16 pm

    I was pretty appalled that the twin's school had Katy Perry songs for choir. One of their friends from church (younger) even had the song 'I've Got A Hangover' on her Nintendo DS, and that got stuck in the kid's heads for a few days.
    It's very hard once they have contact with so many other kids on a daily basis, and those other kids are bringing in their influences from home/elsewhere. I think the best we can hope for is that when we talk to them respectfully and explain how inappropriate it all is, they will come away knowing that their parents love and respect them enough to speak to them as the young adults that they are/going to be. I've definitely had to face the fact that even though they are only in kindy this year, they are growing up much faster than our generation did at that age.
    Good luck!
    Beth.

    Reply
  6. Anne @ Domesblissity says

    November 19, 2012 at 9:41 pm

    I think you're perfectly right with this Jo. It's so hard to escape it though. I think its my daughter's school Grade 4 class are performing the dance at the school Christmas concert! My daughter (now 8) is right into Taylor Swift at the moment. When you listen to the lyrics they are totally inappropriate. She has also been singing Katy Perry and others for choir at school. I'm kinda 'lucky' in a way she doesn't understand what the lyrics mean and is very innocent about it all but I'm not sure what else to do about it. I guess you could say the same about my infatuation with Bay City Rollers when I was about 10. I didn't have a clue what they were singing about. All I knew was that they were kinda cute. Really? Did I think that? LOL

    Anne xx

    Reply

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Hi, I’m Jo

I'm a city girl turned farmer's wife, school teacher, ideas woman, and mum to three country kids. Country Life Experiment is all about simple country living, growing and making our own food, and life on our family farm in rural Australia. Join me as I give country living a try. Read more...
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Team work makes the dream work. We were asked rec Team work makes the dream work. 
We were asked recently whether we “make” our kids work on the farm. The answer is “of course not”. Having said that, all three love to help out whenever they can. They all work hard because they want to; because they take pride in working hard and contributing in a meaningful way to our family life; because they love living on our farm and don’t remember life before we moved here. Whether it be planting trees or doing sheep work or feeding animals, they all want to be involved. As a parent, nothing is better than watching them grow in skill and confidence as they work along side you. We’re so glad that we get to spend time with our three, working together.
We’ve had an unexpected addition to the family ☘️🐑. She is a lot easier to look after than the other family members but she does try to escape her yard and head butt people. Poddy lambs are super cute but they tend to think they are a human. Clover the lamb is sure that Meg is her mum. Can’t think why… 🤔🤣
The perfect way to end a long winter weekend: toge The perfect way to end a long winter weekend: together, cooking damper around the remains of the bonfire.
It’s been a tough few weeks on the farm. We got It’s been a tough few weeks on the farm. We got through shearing without a hitch (thankfully 🙏) but we’ve had a run of the flu followed by Covid run through the family since then. The kids and I have tested positive (this is my second time getting it 🦠) though so far C has managed to avoid it. There has been a lot of lying on the couch feeling pretty ordinary. Han had to reschedule her driving test for a 4th time due to Covid, which is disappointing for her because she wants her freedom and for us because it would be so much more convenient if she could drive herself places. Just to add in to the mix, our hot water system has chosen now as a good time to die so we’re on cold showers until we’re all out of iso. This is not meant to be a whinging post but sometimes life just sucks a bit and it’s good to be real. Fortunately, the sight of the fire going with a stack of wood next to it cheers us up. Things will improve soon. Onwards we go…
A picture perfect Autumn afternoon to end the scho A picture perfect Autumn afternoon to end the school holidays. We’ve been busy spending time with friends and family, harvesting the last of the summer produce, as well as a short escape to explore the big smoke. After the craziness of last term it was the break we all needed. It’s back to school for me tomorrow, and the kids are back on Wednesday. Shearing starts soon and so it’s all systems go over the next few weeks.
Covid has made some late changes to our weekend pl Covid has made some late changes to our weekend plans so we are embracing the unexpected and doing not much at home. Plenty of time for hanging out on the dam and enjoy the perfect weather.

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Hi, I’m Jo

City girl turned farmer's wife, school teacher, ideas woman, and mum to three country kids. Country Life Experiment is all about simple country living, growing and making our own food, and life on our family farm in rural Australia. Join me as I give country living a try. Read more...
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